Do You See What I See?

“Mom, I said it’s time to put the animals to bed now.” Hannah‘s voice alerts me in my half-awake state. With one hand on the baby bouncer and the other holding a plastic animal, I try my best to stay engaged with my three-year-old. We put the animals to bed in the barn and Hannah counts to 10 signifying when the animals will again awaken for another day. I always wish the nights last a little longer in animal play. Judah starts to cry just as Esther yells for help from upstairs. Her classroom blackboard session is frozen. Again. 

Picking up Judah I hurry up the stairs and try to get her reconnected. Not being very tech-savvy myself, I call on Benaiah to help me. Thankfully, he is eager to help and gets her back on. Now Judah needs to be fed, and Hannah is disappointed that our playtime is disrupted yet again. I sit down exhausted, overwhelmed. In the background worship music is playing and these are the words that come to meet me,

“God, I look to You

I won’t be overwhelmed,

Give me vision to see things like You do,

God I look to You, You’re where my help comes from,

Give me wisdom, You know just what to do” (Bethel Music)

Just the prayer I need right now. God’s perspective in exchange for mine.

This fall is shaping out to be a lot different than I planned. After homeschooling for several years, I had decided to put the kids in school. I longed for some time to myself, to focus on other things. But, this was not to be. School was now virtual and preschool was canceled. And, then we had the surprise of another baby to factor in. Judah, having reflux, needs to be held almost continually. From my perspective, things seem out of control and overwhelming. I see the needs. I see the messes. I feel the exhaustion.

How often in life do the needs and demands around us outweigh our natural ability to accomplish them. Sometimes God asks us to do things that seem impossible. And they may be impossible. But with God nothing is impossible.

We habitually see only with natural eyes, lacking the perspective that Jesus desires for us. The disciples did this also. With a crowd of thousands before them, Jesus asks his disciples to feed them. All they see is five loaves and two fish. So, they suggest, like any logical person would, to send them away to the closest village to get their own food. But, Jesus looks up to heaven and thanks his Father for providing food for the great multitude before them. A child’s meal feeds over 5000 people. Humanly impossible. But with God, a supernatural reality that reveals his ability to provide so much more than enough.

As I sat burping Judah, God reminds me of the huge blessing that he is. A surprise, yes. A lot of work, yes. But a life to pour into by the power of the Holy Spirit and with the love of God. He created this little boy, and will faithfully supply what I needed to raise him. The long nights and tiresome days cause me to draw upon God more than I would if I did not feel the need.

Hannah finds me on the couch and gives me one of her huge hugs accompanied with an \”I love you, Mom.\” She has been especially affectionate lately. If she were in preschool, I would be missing this. Her nonstop chatter often drives me up the wall, but God’s patience and steadfast love overcome my imperfect parenting. In my insufficiency, he shows up with saving grace. And, saving help. Benaiah comes downstairs for a screen break and offers to play with Hannah for a while. Thank you God for being the God who provides. 

A few hours later I walk by Esther’s room and hear her sharing a Bible verse about trusting in God’s steadfast love with her online class. She is so bold and confident in her testimony, and my heart soars in joy. If she were in the school building, she may not have had this opportunity, and I would not have been able to hear it. Sure, online school is not ideal, but God is the Master of using all things for the glory of His great Name.  

Sometimes we need only to ask God to open our eyes. Life as we see it is often missing the full picture. Our eyes that are inclined to seeing only the natural miss the supernatural reality that is ever present.

We see a very compelling example of this with Elisha and his servant (2 Kings 6:11-23). They are in Dothan, when during the night, the Syrian army surrounds them on every side. Elisha‘s servant cries out in alarm. Meanwhile, Elisha’s focus is on the greater army of the Lord that is surrounding them, full of horses and chariots of fire. He tells his servant not to be afraid and then prays for his servant’s eyes to be opened so that he may see the Lord‘s army. His eyes are opened and the Lord gives them victory that very day.

We are all living in a battle. Enemies and struggles, visible and invisible, within and without. We can either focus on the battle or we can focus on God. Sometimes it feels like we are being defeated, but God’s perspective reveals the truth. The battle is already won, we just need to see it through eyes of faith.